Useless and insultive tips on Subterranean Animism. If you are easily offended, DO NOT READ THIS
- If you absolutely suck, you shouldn't be playing Subterranean Animism. Subterranean Animism is one of the hardest Touhou games that pisses you off.
HELP! I CAN'T DECIDE WHO TO USE!
- If you suck at streaming or you are just a lazy bastard, use Reimu/Yukari.
- Or basically you like to abuse the teleportation.
- If you are a chicken who is afraid to cross the Point of collection, use Reimu/Suika.
- Or if there are too many bullets that you can't go above the PoC.
- If you are a retard who likes to go pacifist, use Reimu/Aya.
- Aya moves REALLY fast.
- If you are a fearless bastard who likes to lose concentration, use Marisa/Alice.
- Marisa/Alice is stronger when unfocused.
- If you are pathetic enough to sadden because you can't decide sizes, use Marisa/Patchouli.
- Marisa/Patchouli has 8 different attacks.
- If you miss the good old days of Perfect Cherry Blossom, use Marisa/Nitori.
- Marisa/Nitori's bomb is like the supernatural border in PCB.
HELP! I STILL CAN'T DECIDE!
- lol owned
- Damn you're such a pussy
- I mean, just choose a random one and see which best fits you.
HELP! YAMAME IS SO HARD TO BEAT!
- As the first stage boss, you should not be using any lives or bombs unless it's your first to tenth time on lunatic/hard mode. If you are, especially on easy mode, you're probably a noob and you should go play an easier game like Imperishable Night.
HELP! PARSEE IS BULLYING ME!
- Parsee is actually relatively tough for a second stage boss. Don't underestimate her or get cocky just because she is a stage two boss. A lot of her spells require you to go around in circles (not like a crazy douche though, slowly and steadily). Her midboss spellcard: Move around the edges of the screen. Don't go too fast, but not too slow, otherwise the Green Eyed Monster will chow you down like a boss. On her second boss spell, you don't move in circles. Instead, attack the Parsee shooting the smaller bullets, because if you attack the one shooting the huge bubbles, she will suddenly barrage on you and make easy mode seem like Phantasm Mode.
HELP! YUUGI IS A NIGHTMARE!!
- Yuugi is just bs. Her first spell is simple, just don't destory the blue rings. Her second spell has no sort of trick; just dodge as best as you can (however, the hitboxes of the bubbles are miniature). Her third spell: Just get to the centre as the sticks come in. Dodge the sticks as it moves out..
HELP! SATORI IS COPYING MY STUFF!
- Satori is a real bitch and a troll, once you start getting used to one character, if your intention is to unlock extra, stick to ONE character, otherwise you will be facing 123214217656 spells. Because there are too many cards to explain, just watch this. VIDEO DOES NOT BELONG TO ME.
HELP! THERE'S A CAT IN MY EYES!
- Rin is hell annoying, she will bring you down to the crappy Shinto hell and run you through the flames. She is stronger than Utsuho. On her midboss spell, just dodge one circle at a time. On her first and second spellcard, you should be moving in circles. Next spellcard, BEWARE OF THE DAMN BS OP GHOST CIRCLES. THEY WILL HORRIBLY SLAUGHTER YOU TO DEATH. The bullets are pretty easy though. Her final spellcard, you move in circles yet again.
HELP! IT'S A BIRD! IT'S A PLANE! OH SHIT IT'S A NUCLEAR RAVEN!
- I lied. Utsuho is MUCH harder than Rin. Her first spellcard makes you go "WHAT THE HELL". Go to the little space between the suns, and stay there. When the next waves of nuclear suns come out, return to the centre. Second spell: I don't see a pattern. Just pure dodging (OH FUUU--) Third spell: There is a safe spot at just south-east of the centre and you should only be moving horizontally. Fourth spell: Absolute CRAP, burn your eyes will you sit in the middle dodging vertical bullets and be afraid that you will be pulverized by nuclear fusion. Final spell: I'd say probably her easiest spellcard, just keep moving back while forgetting about the white bullets. The white bullets are nothing.
HELP! I'M MEETING A TROLL'S HEARTLESS SISTER!
- You are in fact, brave and manly. Or perhaps just a stupid nerd. Go watch this and note that I don't own that video.